(National Infertility Survivor Day – May 7th):
When someone is going through infertility, it can be tough to find the right words to say, do you give a gift, avoid talking about it, or play it by ear? Sometimes the best gift is one that can’t actually be bought. Just being present and acknowledging them and offering comfort is what they need.
If you want to show you care and offer support here are a few thoughtful gift ideas to help. Before we get into those that may offer support and show you care, let’s first discuss some that you may want to _avoid_ when thinking of gifts for someone struggling with infertility.
Supporting/hopeful: don’t go with hope stones or jewelry with “believe” as it can be perceived as downplaying the severity of their struggle with infertility.
Gifts for when you get pregnant: this would be a huge no. Gifts like these can be a painful reminder. There will be plenty of time for a gift that says, “Worth the Wait” for when they have conceived such as a baby shower, birthing gift but not during their time of struggle.
Advice books: allow them to purchase their own advice books. They know where they are and what they are in need of. Trying to tell them what they need can backfire. Instead, opt for maybe a gift card to Amazon, Barnes & Nobles, or another books store.
- A cozy blanket: A cozy, warm blanket can be a comforting gift for someone struggling with infertility. Choose a soft, high-quality material that will be soothing to the touch. Add a family name to customize it and it can become a family heirloom in the future.
- A journal: A journal can be a therapeutic way for someone to process their emotions and feelings about infertility. Consider a journal with prompts of encouragement. Consider a fertility journal that includes pages for tracking diet, exercise, medications and appointments. Or perhaps one with inspirational quotes and prompts to help your friend through her fertility journey.
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A diffuser and essential oils: Essential oils can be a great way to create a calming and relaxing atmosphere. A diffuser and a set of essential oils can help someone struggling with infertility unwind and de-stress. It’s been shown that oils have a calming, yet revitalizing influence that may improve the functioning of the reproductive system. Here are a few to consider:
- Lavender: Calms and relaxes the mind. It balances the endocrine system and helps regulate scanty menstruation. It is extremely beneficial for people who are in an unbalanced emotional state.
- Geranium: This oil is wonderful for balancing hormones and regulating your cycle. It also has a calming effect to sooth your emotions and help you de-stress.
- Rose Otto: This oil helps to relax the uterus as well as help regulate your menstrual cycle. Rose Otto has a libido-enhancing effect and also improves cervical mucus. But remember: once you are pregnant, it is recommended to discontinue use.
- Clary Sage: This oil influences your estrogen levels and helps your body regulate its hormones naturally. And on top of all that, it’s a libido booster! This is so important when getting pregnant becomes more of a task than a treat.
- Fennel: This essential oil has been renowned for thousands of years for its effects on the female reproductive system. It helps painful periods as well as helps regulate the menstrual cycle.
- An aromatherapy or fertility candle: Candles are perfect for relaxing, to focus and manifest wishes, to clear or draw fresh energy, to anoint or bless a space, and much more! You can even get candles personalized to express a specific vision and intentions creatively.
- A gift Card: Does your friend have a a favorite restaurant, a guilty pleasure or perhaps a shopping habit? If so, then a gift card is a very good thing to gift and may occupy time even for a few hours. You could even gift a scratch note with a night out on the town with friends or to a spa.
- A pleasure reading book or a cookbook: This is a very simple but great way to help a friend relax. Learn what kind of books your friend likes to read and get immersed in. It’s important to choose a book that you think will resonate with your friend and be helpful for them. It could be something just for pleasure like a suspense book or even a cookbook focused on recipes that are healthy and packed with nutrients that can help boost fertility. Add a supportive touch by accompanying the book with one of our heartfelt scratch notes to let them know you care.
- A weekend getaway complete with a spa package just for her and a companion or if your friend is okay with it, invite her family and any close friends and make it that more special with all of you rallying around to offer love and support.
- A greeting card: a card is always a thoughtful way to tell a friend how wonderful and loved they are and can often bring comfort when you are not sure what to say. For an even better treat and to further drive home the point of spending time with them, add one of our DIY scratch-notes including a message of encouragement or support, such as “You are not alone,” “I am here for you,” or “You are loved,” or even to announce the gift of your time doing some of the things mentioned above such as going to a “Sip & Paint,” “Girls Weekend Getaway.”
An even greater gift idea:. chose a few gifts mentioned from this list and put together a care package or a gift basket for your friend. Such as a blend of calming essential oils, a cozy throw in her favorite color then add in her favorite coffee and some snacks and make it a movie night. Your thoughtful gift ideas will make for the best gift for your dear friend.
Remember, spending time with someone who is in the midst of the infertility struggle is a great way to support them. Just being there for them is one of the best things to do and goes a long way in making them feel cared for.
Whether they just got the news or she’s on her fourth IVF cycle, she needs your support and care. Close friends can make a big difference. If she needs it, give her plenty of space. But be there for her as she waits for good news month after month.
